what has this family turning into?
everyday..it's just cold war or a breakout..fierce fighting..scolding..shouting at ppl..and even poor starhub ppl who is promoting his service oso kana..i've really have enuff of it..
sometimes i just wish to get married and just officially leave this family..but another fear of jumping into another one like this makes me stay put of this thought..
i don think most of the family are like tat..either they're unhappy..they divorce..and they won quarrel with each other another..at least the family stay in a peaceful without a family member around..rather than hating each other and staying together just to hurt themselves..and others..
i noe no matter how i wish to leave..i can't leave this house..this house is full of hatred..suspicion..fear..anger..depression..and this kind of atmosphere is affecting me..deep down in me for so many years..
staying in hostel is my most happy time..at least i noe the house will not quarrel so much bcos of me..
if u ask me if i have the time..wad can i exchange for..i wish i can use the time to change the situation in the family..cos it's getting from worse to worse..going to the temple and pray is not wad i need..wad i need is practical stuff..some solid time with everyone..
being in this family makes me so tired..it's more tired than my cockup timetable in school..cos a cockup timetable just screw u up for a year..but a screw up family screw u up forever..
i am a girl..i feel alot and i mind it alot alot..i though my act silliness and childishness will make the mood in the family better..but it doesn't make mum's better..i tried to stay away..end up a sis who doesn't understands says i do not care at all..i tried to care..but dad doesn't care at all..wad is really wrong with the family..and the elders doesn't want to solve the problem at all..wad can i do..
sometimes i really need a pat or a hug from them..but i never ever get any..
if my time can really exchange for peace in the family..i'll put down everything and do anything for it..
